In the very beginning of this Ted Talk I was captivated, the eloquence with which Andrew speaks, is truly captivating. Truly, no one does think about the ludicrous feeling of not wanting to take food out of the fridge for lunch, not being able to get out of bed to shower.
It is also an interesting idea that we are far behind in treatment for illnesses like depression, yet we have come so far in the past 100, 50, 20 years.
I have found myself not being able to do those same things lately, not walking downstairs to get food out of the fridge, not leaving the house. It’s a huge problem, it’s an illness that plagues the world, and I find it interesting that it seems that nothing can separate this illness from individual personality and character. Diluting your mental state with medication is sometimes necessary and beneficial, but it is that, that separates yourself from your own insight. Existential questions that are asked by all, mingle in the brain of the depressed, are pondered often and thoroughly…. I wish it felt beautiful and profound to be a person who ponders, sometimes I suppose it is.
I’m interested to hear any thoughts about this, it can be lonely struggling with your own mind, it can be frustrating when you search for connection on a ground that is so individual and personal. I myself, am trying to find the beauty in asking the tough questions, finding the possibilities within my own incessant mind. What about you?
I’ve been wondering lately why it is that in this time, almost everything can be related to views. We see the world through a lens of pixels and screens, and if we aren’t being seen, we are seeing others who are. I have caught myself refreshing my stats for the day on this blog, constantly hoping someone will recognize me sitting here, all over the place, with no obvious direction, and make sure I’m seen… I’m hoping for someone else to come in and whisk me away to a place where things make sense, I find success, and everything is just a-ok because I have views and that’s all that I need right? Well I’m quite obviously wrong…. The truth really is that this blog has very little direction. It’s where I take all my interests to a screen and hope that someone else sees where I can succeed and carries me along a path that I can’t even see myself.
Alas, the world is not so simple, even with all the technology we have at our fingertips.
Alas, I am still figuring life out, seemingly at a snails pace, I’m trying to figure myself out too. Where I fit, who I can be, what I can be, and most importantly, how I can make a living in this cutthroat place.
I have dreams, and dreams require funds, and funds are only made through… well a job. I have been working again part-time during this age of Corona virus, I have been making my keep, but I strive for a passionate interest that can mean both success and a life I love. I have so many things to be grateful for, and I don’t want to take all the things that I do have for granted. I’m simply wondering, and contemplating the struggle that is finding what it is that will bring me sustenance as well as happiness.
Have any of you found a true passion in your work? What do you do? How did you find your happiness in life?
Thanks for listening to this random rant about life, what else is a young adult to do besides share their idealistic fantasies?
Someone I know sent me a link to an article titled “The Children of Pornhub” from the NY times. He asked me to write something about it, to which I responded, I’m not sure I can. The reason I said this was due to the nature of the content, the fact that this topic is so vile and frankly depressing. However, I realized that it is not acceptable for me to turn away from the topics that require the most recognition and activism. I have plenty of other things that I could research, and write about. I plan to write about many different topics, if for nothing other than fulfilling my own personal need to learn about the realities of the world.
I will write a brief synopsis of what I have learned about the exploitation of children in the porn industry, and then I will leave a series of links, if you would like to further your knowledge on the topic.
The article that was sent to me, opens your eyes to how easy it is for people to publish pornographic content containing children and/or abuse, neglect, rape, etc. It also explains that there are cases where children go missing (are taken), only to have someone recognize them in videos on sites like pornhub, once the authorities get involved they can force the site to take said videos down. Unfortunately though, it’s most likely too late, as there have already been downloads and shares to other sites and to other people.
“I came across many videos on Pornhub that were recordings of assaults on unconscious women and girls. The rapists would open the eyelids of the victims and touch their eyeballs to show that they were nonresponsive.
Pornhub profited this fall from a video of a naked woman being tortured by a gang of men in China. It is monetizing video compilations with titles like “Screaming Teen,” “Degraded Teen” and “Extreme Choking.” Look at a choking video and it may suggest also searching for ‘She Can’t Breathe.'”
The Children of Pornhub, Nicholas Kristoff
There is also the issue of accountability, as the site itself takes no responsibility for the content posted to the site. It is said that Facebook has taken down 12.4 million images related to child exploitation in only three months, twitter closed 264,000 accounts in 6 months. Pornhub however, noted that the Internet Watch Foundation reported only 118 instances of exploitative content/child abuse in a three year period. This figure seems completely illegitimate for the 10th most visited website on the internet, let alone a website profiting off of sexual fantasies, with “teen” being one of the top searches.
Political action has been very scarcely implemented throughout this ever growing problem, the tech industry has also done little to assist in the fight. There has however been an increase in activism to fight this digital threat. PayPal has cut off their services for the company, and many other credit card companies have been asked to do so as well. Ben Sasse, a Nebraskan senator has also asked that the Justice Department investigate Pornhub. Canada has also been taking a larger stand against child exploitation on Pornhub.
So, looking at all of the problems associated with Pornhub in particular, it is also important to state that Pornhub is owned by a company by the name, Mindgeek, which owns a myriad of other x-rated sites, and is said to have more influence over society than Microsoft, Amazon, and Apple. Making it the 3rd ‘largest’ Tech conglomerate.
“The goal for a content moderator is to let as much content as possible go through,” a former Mindgeek employee told me. He said he believed that the top executives weren’t evil but were focused above all on maximizing revenue.
While Pornhub would not tell me how many moderators it employs, I interviewed one who said that there are about 80 worldwide who work on Mindgeek sites (by comparison, Facebook told me it has 15,000 moderators). With 1.36 million new hours of video uploaded a year to Pornhub, that means that each moderator would have to review hundreds of hours of content each week.
The moderators fast forward through videos, but it’s often difficult to assess whether a person is 14 or 18, or whether torture is real or fake. Most of the underage content involves teenagers, the moderator I spoke with said, but some comes from spy cams in toilets or changing rooms and shows children only 8 to 12.
“The job in itself is soul-destroying,” the moderator said.”
After Jeffrey Epstein opened the worlds eyes to child sex trafficking, and exploitation. How have we not made it absolutely impossible for content like this to surface on the internet? It’s a continual fight against something so incredibly vile. Young people’s lives are at risk, I certainly couldn’t imagine life after an experience like these poor children have gone through. Many who have survived these encounters, end up mentally distressed, and often attempt suicide.
What are we as people, all living on this planet, going to do to make change, and force out these injustices?
I decided to try something new, art block has been a struggle lately, so experimenting with new concepts has been a great way to spark creativity. I am excited to try more abstract painting styles in the near future, and I’m hoping some of the final products will make great Christmas gifts for family and friends. If I have any finished pieces of a good enough quality I will definitely consider selling some, if anyone is interested.
This pouring technique left my acrylic inventory dangerously low, so it looks like I will have to order more ASAP. Has anyone else tried this painting technique before? I find the whole process fascinating, and it is actually not a terribly difficult. A little disclaimer though, if you decide to try this at home, make sure you have plenty of space and cover anything and everything of value, because it is VERY messy. That happens to be one of the things I love about it though.
I decided to start this first attempt with simply water and acrylic, about a 40/60 ratio. If you are going to give it a go, the paint has to be super liquid-y for the blow dryer to efficiently spread the paint around the canvas. Overall though, the supplies needed, and the technique is quite simple. Just pour a bunch of liquid paint on the canvas and blow it around until you have a design you like! I found that the less you mess with it, the better. My first attempt went south very fast because I kept messing with different abstract styles on the same canvas, without a plan at all.
I know that some of you may lack interest in science, it is something I have been interested in since I can remember. Uncovering the secrets, mysticism, of the world with data, experimentation, and of course the scientific method of theory and evidential proof.
As I’ve gotten older my perspective around science has altered drastically, the idea that you need a degree, to pursue scientific discovery, is something that I think has turned many away from the field and the overall concept of scientific exploration. There are so many opportunities to conduct mini experiments throughout your life. Whether they are purely scientific or otherwise, I find that it’s important to ask the critical questions anyway. I maintain the philosophy that, life in and of itself is a big experiment. Therefore, I find the critical thinking skills so strongly tied to all fields of science an immeasurably important concept to consider in some form, on a semi-regular basis.
In my life, I find science in little things almost everyday, but that’s simply because of my personal interest in the discoveries we have been able to make as a species. What I am trying to say is hard to put into written words, but hopefully you can understand what I’m trying to say. The basic fundamentals of science, question, hypothesize, theorize, experiment, answer… All of these things are also fundamentals of life and self-development.
And THAT is what draws me to science, THAT in turn, is what draws me to life.
I’m currently considering producing some videos, and/or posts, around different topics that have fascinated me recently. These are topics ranging from the development of electricity, and Thomas Edisons’ fraudulence, to the Bush administration and it’s environmental approach that has unfortunately paved the way for a lack of understanding in the US pertaining to climate change and the impact that it could very well have on the entire world in the next 50 years or less, to space exploration, to psychology and it’s inability to create a broad testing system that is accurate for each individual.
As of now, I’m uncertain how to format any of these topics properly, and would have a large amount of further research to do, but let me know if you’re interested in seeing anything like that in the future. I appreciate all of you, and I hope to hear your ideas, perspectives, and opinions!
It’s been running through my mind since my last post, and I really want to put myself out there and start a discussion. Please, if you take the time to read this, I would love to gather anyone with an open mind, and change my quest for this blog a bit. I have recently been really intrigued by the prospect of creating a network, a network that enables anyone and everyone to explore their own interests and start discussions with others that may have knowledge or expertise, or even interest in said area.
If anyone is the least bit interested or has any ideas on how to set up something like that, I would love any and all input. This is a call to start something that I know could be great, with the right community of free thinkers, I have faith that something uplifting, helpful, and interesting can emerge.
The internet has revolutionized the way we live our lives, why not utilize what we already have and so often take for granted? Why not create connections, conversations, and new opportunities?
I know that there are many platforms that are already being used to continue discussions, but my idea is to create something a bit more close knit and intimate between the people on the other end of the screen.
So, again, if anyone has an idea on how to organize a platform like that I would love to talk to you, and start something new. Feel free to email me at: email@example.com, or leave a comment on this or any post of mine with contact information.
When was it that we decided learning could only be done in schools? When did we become complacent with our knowledge/ability to learn?
I have been fairly consistent in pursuing my right to continue learning, even though I refuse to take part in the current education system. There is so much information out there, and in this age it is possible to find information on nearly anything in mere moments. I am partial to physical books, however I find the internet remarkable.
I have been at a loss for words lately, which means this blog is the first thing to lose engagement. I call this time of year my hibernation period, in part because this is the time I ingest information much more than I bring any new ideas and/or content to the world.
I’m still here, I’m just pursuing my Life education, which I find much more important than any accolades, certificates, or diplomas.
Does anyone else feel the urge to consume more information at certain times of year, or periods of life? If I starting writing about what I decided to learn every few days, would anyone be interested? Would anyone join me in this pursuit?
I’m currently reading a book I bought at a thrift store a while back for 50 cents. It’s titled, The Best American Science and Nature Writing by various scientists and academics. While the book is from the year 2005, I’ve learned a lot about the development of science, through not only the discoveries themselves, but also the political and social background of scientific advancement. It was a book I was not overly excited to pick up, however, I have been pleasantly surprised by how interesting most of these writings actually are. I may have to look for more current versions of the series after I finish this one.
So, here we are in a world full of information, what are we going to do with that luxury?
PS. Sorry for being MIA, it really is that time of year. I dyed my hair red, went into hibernation, and have yet to find a way to drag myself out. If anyone has any tips or pointers on staying happy in the freezing cold, I could really use any advice. Thanks for stopping by.
You brave soldier have dedicated your life to a pursuit of freedom and for that I am grateful. You have made yourself a target and proudly honored your flag. What a disturbance it is to see that you aren’t taken care of after your valiance.
I have members of my family who have served, and it has been engrained in me to respect and appreciate those who are willing to do so.
However, I do not have to respect and appreciate a government that has so often cast loyal veterans aside. A government that doesn’t invest enough into soldiers acclimation back into a civil society, and a government that documents a soldiers worth off of how long they serve, or how tough they are both mentally and physically. Strength comes from those willing to accept and work on their weaknesses, the military does a great job of hardening individuals, making them more machine than human being.
Like I said, I have family members who have served, and my uncle passed this year, not from Covid or from war. I believe it was a slow degradation of the mind and spirit post-service. It lead to health issues that may have been too difficult for him to handle. The truth is I don’t know for sure how it happened, or when it started. We had always been incredibly close even though we didn’t talk as much in the past 8 years or so… We had a bond that I didn’t think needed confirmation, but I still wish he would’ve called more, I wish I would’ve called more. I wish I managed to take more trips to see him. It was always in the plan, I was going to take a road trip across the US and I would stay in Texas with him for a month or so, just to catch up, have fun, and talk for the first time as adults. I would get some advice about life, and I would listen to anything he wanted to get off of his chest. We would rekindle our friendship and drink a bunch of beer, take a few shots of whiskey. I’d leave with the promise of coming back to visit soon.
34 years was not long enough, and I wish he would’ve been better taken care of because even though he loved and respected the military, it doesn’t seem that that feeling was reciprocated. In that way, the cost was a life, it was quality of life for years, and now it’s the absence of one. And quite frankly that makes me angry.
It also makes me angry that my grandfather served in Vietnam, he went through absolute and total hell, and left with two Purple Hearts. The answer through all of the physical ailments and PTSD was opiates, and is to this day. Therapy doesn’t work as it is in the VA, trauma takes patience and years of diligence, yet once you’re done serving the operative is to get them out of your hair.
So yes, I respect, appreciate, and love the veterans of my country but, will we start taking care of them as they deserve to be taken care of?